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GUESS WHO’S NOT COMING HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS?

“Home for the Holidays” isn’t always the right place to be at a time when tensions, estrangements and difficult situations are likely to surface between the appetizers and the pumpkin pie. Maybe you should rethink whether or not to plan a different kind of Christmas dinner this year.

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Interdependence – The Goal of Maturity?

When is a grown child independent and why do we want them to be? Outside of the United States, most cultures see interdependence as a more harmonious, mutual way to live.

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When Grown Kids “Ghost” a Parent’s Wedding

Nobody really expected them, although the bride and groom, whose combined age exceeded 140 years, never truly gave up hope that their grown kids would show up for their wedding. “Ghosting” rituals that signify parental late-life re-partnering—engagement, marriage, or moving in together—is the most obvious expression of the loyalty conflicts many adult children feel when a divorced – Read More

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Between the Lines

We all want to be fair to our grown kids, but sibling rivalry often gets in the way, especially when their cooperation is most important in our elder years, when parental emergencies re-energize old issues among them.

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A Different Kind of Family Travel

When my kids were younger and I was richer, we traveled – initially on their school vacations, and later whenever time, money and circumstances allowed. It was how we celebrated Christmas after the divorce, ignoring the Hallmark hoopla and getting away to the nearest warm water and weather I could afford. Once we all learned – Read More

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The Stranger in the Bedroom

Recent graduates back for a detour on the road to real life? Postparenting coach advises getting to know the people they’ve become, not the kids they used to be.

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There Is No Perfect Mom, Rosie

What’s a parent to do when a teenager makes bad choices – and she’s only a few days from becoming an adult? Take the safety net off and put it under instead of over her, this postparenting expert advises.

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They’re Back in College, But You’re Still Worried

  My postparent coach phone rings frequently after the holidays are over. The house  isrestored to order, and the kids, their clean laundry, and their second semester tuition check are back on campus. But their worried parents are unsettled by the strangers who just left. Sometimes it’s because they came home, dropped their bags, and – Read More

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I Just Can’t Quit You, Jeff

The disclaimer comes first. In Amazon’s early days, I had a regular gig reviewing mystery novels — it was like being a taster at the chocolate factory! Still, it wasn’t enough to convince me to invest in their stock, which could then be had for even less than my occasional $50 review checks. As a – Read More

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TRADING THE BUCKET LIST IN FOR THE F##K IT LIST

Everyone I know is downsizing. We still come home from our travels with souvenirs for the grandchildren, but nothing more to adorn, decorate or set off the too many things we already own. “Not one more thing for the Box,” declares Henry, which is where he puts the chotchkes his wife can’t keep herself from – Read More

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